Monday 23 December 2013

Christmas: A time for family and friends (Part 2)

So I was talking about my family last time and by that I do not mean the family I created but the one I was born into. This time it is about the family I have created and my two best friends, this is the last post.

Thomas (My partner) - We have been together for about 8 years, obviously we have had ups and downs like any couple. We have been through funerals, weddings and lots of parties together. I wouldn't change it for the world, I love the fact we argue, it means we care (although it pisses me off at the time). No matter how irritating he gets (with singing obnoxiously) I will still love him, he can be very uncaring but also he can be very caring.

Joshua (My oldest) - He is 6... It's amazing how quick they grow and he has his own weird attitude, he can go from shy to just plain crazy. I have learnt a lot with Joshua that I hopefully wont do with Harry, like giving him sweets when he obviously doesn't deserve it. He is truly an amazing little boy, he might not be the smartest in his class but he has his own things he is good at! Like football!

Harry (My youngest) - He is 6 months, he has also grown far to quick and will need his 9-12 month clothes in the next few days! He is currently ill but he is still a VERY good child (I will never stop saying this: I am very lucky). Don't get me wrong, we have bad days and I haven't taken to motherhood as well this time. I don't feel like there is enough support as there was with Josh, maybe people just assume if you already have one that you know what your doing... each child is different so if you have friends who has kids but another one on the way - support them. Harry is super sweet though, you say boo and he laughs, you put Josh in front of him and he laughs!

In alphabetical order (I have no favourites because they are both really different)

Bee (Journeys are my Diary) - She is amazing, great at planning events and truly looks out for her friends (Although they do not give her the credit she deserves and probably take her for granted). We have known each other for a while but only became friends about 3/4 years ago? We got closer and then became best friends! I can't say I know EVERYTHING about her but I know a fair bit. I also feel honoured that we have never fallen out (Arguing with a friend is not good but fighting for a friend is - which she has done). People do take her the wrong way a lot or think she's pissed off when actually she is upset but me I just dive in and ask questions (what's the worse that can happen other than someone yelling at you? Which she has never done!) She forces me to try new things, like egg nog (yuck) and brussel sprouts (yuck but I got a candy cane for it!)

Hollie aka Momo (A Touch of Magic) - I have known her over 11 years and we hit it off straight away (I probably scared her into being my friend), I literally walked up to her and introduced myself with my full name and said we might as well be friends since we will be in this class for 2 years together. It worked! She knows a lot of random things about me and I her, we have had our ups and downs but made up in the silliest of ways (Want to play cards?) She changes her mind as quick as traffic lights and is really funny. People also take her the wrong way, either because she hasn't made it clear to what she means or she is quiet. She is very quiet but I don't see that side of her unless we are around a lot of people, when we are together we "bounce" off each other and laugh at stupid things.

I count these two as my family more than friends because they do so much for me and I love them! I can say I still do not feel very Christmassy and my mother has suggesting cooking, we will see. Today I have been making decorations with Joshua because that is what he wanted to do. I will leave it here for today, thanks for reading (if you got this far)

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year (who knows when I will next post!)

Sunday 22 December 2013

Christmas: A time for family and friends (Part 1)

Last night I was dressed as an elf at Bee's Murder mystery (Journeys are my Diary) I am sure she will post about it! It was very Christmassy, we even had a very yummy Christmas dinner and bribed/stole/paid people with candy canes for secrets etc. I ended up with over 60... I only took 20 home since I wouldn't have eaten them all, even if I am a sweet-alcoholic. Anyway, the reason for this post is because I don't feel Christmassy still and I wanted to share a few things.

My Mother - The best in my eyes, she is a bargain hunter and even though we were poor we didn't go without at Christmas. We got a main present then a few other ones (not including the stockings from Santa), we were never spoilt which I am grateful for! We had a reasonable mountain of presents that fit under the tree (except when we got bikes) and I hope I can pass this on to my children... We never went abroad but we went butlins every year so I am grateful for my mother and she does not get the recognition that she deserves.

My Father - Although he irritates me at time (with crappy jokes) he is still my Father and I love him! He has changed a lot in the past couple of years (he had cancer so he realised what was important in life but he has had the all clear last year - they still check on him however). He does have a caring side and Christmas would not be the same if he actually got home on time from the pub!

Jane - She is my oldest sister (I don't think I have spoken about her before), she was addicted to drugs but should be drug free now. I hardly see her or her children, although we spoke on the phone a few days ago (Where she told me she has liver disease among other things). I remember how she use to be, when they visited us and we would chat about nothing.

John - My only brother (I have spoken about him and his depression). If you were to ask me how he was, I couldn't tell you. The last time I heard anything about him was when my nephew (his son) gave him a black eye. Although I love my brother I wish he would realise how he neglects his family (his little one and his father). My mother (although step-mother to John) and Father have not seen them or the kids for a while now which saddens me.

Carrie - I don't know how much I can share with you about Carrie right now, but I am uber excited and I hope it all goes to plan! We have been a lot closer now I am older (There is quite an age gap between us all! Except Amber and I) and I love the fact she now confides in me!

Amber - When we were younger we fought a lot more but these days we seem better! She is so like my father at times, although I am sure she doesn't see it, they have the same kindness (random and thoughtful). She spoils both of my sons and has gotten the oldest into football... yay...

That is my family when I was younger, I have my own little family and of course my friends which make a different family too!

Merry Christmas, I am hoping to do another post shortly.

Monday 16 December 2013

I suppose I should blog...

So, I figured I haven't posted for a while and I really should, otherwise I will never get into this blogging thing! I reckon this will only be a short post because I am UBER busy at the moment (yes I did need to use capitals).

Let's talk about sleep! Last night I got up around 4 times for Harry, he's six months now and normally wakes once or twice (yes I am that lucky!). Then I did the worst thing I could do, around 6ish I bought him into my bed, I was just tired and unfortunately I don't think straight when I am tired! One of the things I am struggling with getting to sleep, normally I would say I fall to sleep instantly but I suppose this time of year is normal for lack of sleep. I go to bed, try and sleep but will my brain let me? No! It goes on and on about what I need to do!

Let's talk about tidying! I am not a tidy person, I will never say I am one of those mums who keeps her house in great nick! I just don't want to, I have the time (Harry permitting) but no motivation. However saying all of that, as of two days ago I started to gut my house and clean it. I started with the kitchen/dinning room and threw out all the crap we don't use then organised the cupboards so it looked good. Then yesterday I did the living room, doing the same thing! Today I am going to do Harry's room plus clean the bathrooms (since his is the smallest and easiest). Please do not ask me why, I have no clue but I would like to keep it up.

Let's talk about Christmas! Please don't... I actually cannot bare to think about it but thought I should at least mention it since we are 9 sleeps away. I am no where near with my gifts, I haven't wrapped anything and to be honest I don't know what I can afford! I don't feel the slightest bit Christmassy, even though my tree is up and I have watched endless Christmas movies! Hopefully the Christmas Murder Mystery we are having at Bee's (Journeys are my Diary) with put me in the spirit but that is not till Saturday!

I am going to stop because I said this was going to be a short post and I need to get on with my cleaning...

Wednesday 23 October 2013

Rand Farm

So, I haven't wrote anything for a while and it's not like anyone really reads these posts other than my friends. I have been beating myself up - inside - not actually hitting myself etc. You know, like when you are down you see all your faults and nothing good about yourself. But I am not going to get into that, I don't want to.

So Sunday I took my oldest son (now 6) and three of his friends to Rand Farm, it was his birthday treat but not a party!
All the kids I have ever been with have LOVED Rand Farm, it is a farm (of course) with an outdoor play area and indoor play area. The animals were not the favourite for the kids, I bought 4 pack of animal feed thinking it would only be my son who wouldn't feed the animals (I tend to do it to show how there is nothing to be scared of). There was one boy who fed the animals, the other two chucked the food at the animals and I fed them nicely. The main problem was the kids would RUN every where until one of the kids fell over, I felt awful but he wasn't hurt. He got a little wet from the puddles and his hands didn't even have scrapes on, after a little hug and hand holding he was fine.


So as you can see from the map it's pretty big and its not too bad price wise - £8.95 per a person (including kids but under 2's are free) and they also do family tickets as well which makes it a little cheaper. I then paid £1 per a quad for the children to go on the electric quads, which they enjoyed. After that they wanted to go to the indoor play area so that is exactly what we did, we arrived at 10:30 and it was about 11ish when we went into the indoor play area. Then around 12 is when the first tractor ride starts, so we had a ride on the tractor, it gets real close to the cows and the kids love that! After the tractor ride we had lunch, which was rather interesting, I had told them they had to eat two sandwiches (it was one normal size for an adult cut into 4) and they all did this. They all ate really well and one kid (who is skinny) ate 2 jam sandwiches, a packet of cheese and onion crisp, a small sausage roll, 5 mini sausages, a yoghurt, chocolate biscuit and an apple! I was really surprised but I guess I am so use to my son eating like a sparrow (just like me when I was younger except he eats veg!)

After lunch we went on the cycle go karts, then to the outdoor play area which has LOADS to do from trampolines to the norm (swings etc). After a while it got cool so we went back inside to finish the day in the indoor play area. We left about 3 ish, so we were there for about 5 hours and when the weather is nice you could stay there for so much longer it opens 10 - 6 in the summer. It is worth the price and even then you can get offer like one adult goes free when paying full price for a child.

Check out the website: Rand Farm Park

Tuesday 15 October 2013

Favourite 5's

So I am still ill but a LOT better, just a really bad earache and a little weak. But hey what can I expect with burnt glands, at least I am being treated - just got to hope it works. This means I have been missing my exercising and will be for the week, so today Hollie (aka Momo over at A Touch of Magic ) came over with her Husband Chris (over at This, That and Everything Else ) and their son Oscar (too young to have a blog). It really cheered me up and made me forget the pain for a little bit. During our random discussions, we talked about how well we know each other and that we didn't know certain things. For example: I have no idea what Hollie's favourite movie is, turns out she doesn't have just one! So we talked what our favourite 5's might be so here it is.

Movies

Mulan - Disney is not just for kids, I love Disney and Mulan is my favourite. I love the characters and songs.
Anastasia - Again another cartoon movie but I love the idea that she survives and her sassy attitude
The Hunger Games - Just because it's BRILLANT
Avengers Assemble - OMG, all those MEN... plus action equals yum!
Captain America - Some people might disagree but this is my favourite. I love how a weedy kid turns to be a hero.

Programmes

How I met your Mother - Bee (over at Journeys are my diary ) got me into this and I am SO glad, it's funny, sad and exciting!
Hollyoaks - It's like a sin to watch it but once I started I just couldn't stop. When you miss some it doesn't take long to get back into it
Revolution - It wont be long until its back on!!! I think it's really interesting, I can't wait for it to begin again.
New Girl - I love Jess in this, in fact all the characters make me giggle. It's a programme I can watch and relax with.
Under the Dome - Again, strange but fantastic.

Books

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire - is probably my favourite out of the series, I just love all the action and twists to it.
The Hunger Games - Let's face it without 1 what would 2 and 3 be?
Tomorrow when the War began - Normally I am not into war books but after watching the movie I wanted to read the book
Breaking Dawn - I just love the last book of the Twilight Series, again this is a sin.
I heart New York - who doesn't love a romance novel? The I heart series is GREAT for that.

Food

Galaxy Chocolate
Flying Saucers
Rainbow drops
Midget Gems
Sherbet

*yes SWEETS, it counts as food but just in case*

Cheese
Dumplings
Yorkshire Puddings
Mash Potato
Chippy Chips

Actors

Tom Welling - Only reason is he's HOT ok and I love the way he acts
Robert Downy Jr - FANTASTIC actor
Josh Hutcherson - I thought he was a good actor but when he joined hunger games I liked him more
Adam Sandler - I don't care what people say I think he's funny
I am torn between the Hemsworth brothers, so I will say Chris because otherwise it will be ALL hunger games ;)

Actress'

Rachel Weisz - first female crush (not in a sexual way)
Jennifer Lawerence - Geeze that girl can act!
Dame Maggie Smith - I think she is gooddddddd especially as McGonagall
Alyson Hannigan - So funny, love her in HIMYM
Selena Gomez - my favourite is her in Wizards of Waverly Place, she is quite a good actress in my eyes

Monday 14 October 2013

Ill Post

So currently I am on my sofa in PJ bottoms with a hot water bottle, blanket and a warm up teddy. I feel better than I did yesterday but still rather weak, I hate being sick and with having a 6 year old (not really a problem) and a 4 month old, well lets say I felt like an awful mum.

So today I went the doctors with 3 problems:
- A shoulder issue which has been affecting me since late pregnancy, its all achy and hurts quite a bit. I have been putting off going the doctors about it.
- Earache, my Mum said it use to affect me a lot when I was younger. It makes me feel rather dizzy but my warm up teddy (Pedro is his name) helps.
- Vomiting and (unfortunate for you all to know) diarrhoea. This came on late afternoon with a burning sensation in my chest (which I assumed was my indigestion from pregnancy - I am not pregnant anymore so it should have gone)

My doctor was not the nicest of people to be honest, he was a bit of a prick. However, I understand that it must be quite stressful for him when you have to do quick appointments. Manner do not cost anything is the saying I wanted to use on him. I was grateful that he checked out everything for me, my shoulder he has referred me to physio... YAY (not - if its at the hospital I doubt I will be able to go).
Then he checked my ears, he saw no problem except a gland which feels a bit swollen. He has put it down to my indigestion, when I lie down he thinks the acid is coming up and burning the glands... which I am not sure about but I am not a doctor. He has given me some tablets to repair my throat etc as he thinks during pregnancy I have burnt it and its not had time to repair...

I did put on my FB page "Could this day get any worse" I don't tend to put those posts but I was at my wits end with sickness. I barely slept last night and my youngest didn't sleep well either, so today I am very tired. I was so grateful that people asked me if I was ok within minutes of the post, it shows you that they care! Even my partners Mum said I should have contacted her (she has actually looked after me when I had one of these ill sessions) but I thought my partner would be back shortly so didn't bother. However, it is times like that, that I realise how badly I miss my Mum. My Mum would have come round and sorted everything! But that's the problem with living on the other side of the country, instead I just moan to her down the phone - she's a great Mum. I wish I could be half the Mum she is.

Saturday 12 October 2013

Footie Mad

My family is obsessed with football, by that I mean my Mother, Father and my sister who is only 18 months older. Ever since we were young we had to attend Crewe Alexander's football matches (The Alex or Crewe for short), I remember going and in the end I hated it. People yelling abuse at footballers, watching them kick back and to - URGH. When I was old enough I could stay home by myself and I loved it.

Then my oldest son came about and of course my family got to him. He adores the Alex even though we live 2 hours away, when we are over there he watches them and currently owns the home and away kit. So when he was old enough I took him to Soccertots, he loves that too. Only problem was I would have to stand out in ALL weathers, but now he is ok with me sitting inside whilst he plays. This year they are training for next year when they will be in teams and I am actually getting quite into it. Although I wont be telling my family that, I enjoy watching him play and I get annoyed when he hand balls or is silly.

Today we had several silly moments, the first moment was when he fell over and hurt his knees - he cried. Normally he doesn't cry about this but I couldn't even cheer him up and in the end the coach came over to get him - which worked. Then when I was having a cup of tea inside, he comes over from the pitch and is crying AGAIN. This time one of his friends stole the ball and they weren't suppose to. I said it was just a game, if he keeps getting upset we could go and not come back. I then got up to go to which he runs back to the pitch and plays again. During the match he even used his hand so he doesn't get hit in the face so I tried to explain that he cant use his hands. He just doesn't want to be hit in the face but one of his friends got whacked with the ball in his face so hard he fell back with it, did he cry - NO. So at the end I have realised I have raised a soft boy... I am proud of him and love him to bits. The only downside is me - I have wrapped him up so much he can't even take a hit from a ball.

*Bad mum who has ruined her son's chance at being a footballer* ;)

Friday 11 October 2013

Death

Death will affect everyone at some point in their lives, some earlier than others and then some not until they are adults (which makes them very lucky). This isn't a topic I ever thought I would blog about, however recently my partner has experienced 2 deaths within weeks of each other. The first being his Great Aunt (I believe) whom he didn't know very well but it lead to him seeing his Little Grandma's grave (which is his Great Grandma) - tears follow him when he thinks of her. Then last night he spoke to me about a family friend, I think it's his Godmothers Dad who had some sort of brain problem (whether it was cancer or something else - he's not sure). He was rather upset but he has not experienced a lot of death and is sensitive to it.

Myself I have experienced at least 7 if not more, which is not a lot but it started when I was about 6. When you are that age, you cry. My family is what I call an old family, my parents are not in their late 40's, my father is 70 next year and my mother is 61 next year. I am 26 so those ages (especially my Father) normally are grandparent age (which they are and have been since I was 2). My Grandparents are all dead, I am not upset anymore about them being gone as most was when I was a child. My Grandad (who did not like me) died when I was in my first year of uni and pregnant with my first child - he was the last death I experienced and although it was sad I cried for the lost of all my grandparents. I have even have suffered the lost of an Aunt (not great).

The problem with having an old family is that everyone thinks its a great grandparent or other great relative. I understand that death is difficult for everyone but I am not sad for those I no longer have, that is not what they want. They want you to be happy and live your life. Be happy for those who are still here and the family you have. I try to do that every day but I live in fear of who it will be next, when you have no grandparents or great aunties/uncles - it can only be those who are closer. Sad but true

Sunday 6 October 2013

Nightmares

For most of my life I have suffered with nightmares, yes it sounds like I am a child but it isn't something I have control over. When I was younger (approx. 6) our house was robbed which I remember clearly, I remember coming in and seeing our house being a bomb site (which is a crime in itself - for my mum). I remember crying because they took our Gameboys and our favourite games Zelda. Worst of all I remember that they took our golden dolphin necklaces that my Nana had bought us and she died just before. After that I don't remember anything, my mum however remembers I got very ill. I suffered from nightmares where the burglars came back and burnt down our house. After that I lost a lot of confidence, I was nervous about nothing and I suffered from nightmares daily until recently.

When I was pregnant with my second child, I had weird dreams but not nightmares as such. For the 3 months he has been born, I had weird dreams but not nightmares until last night. I believe its because I didn't sleep well being pregnant and obviously after that my son woke us. However, recently he has slept through, for 4 days straight and I feel ever so lucky. That might change but he has only ever woken 2 times a night (except on odd occasions when its more). So I have been getting proper sleep, hence the nightmare.

My nightmares are all odd, this one was at my friends house on an RAF base (which has civilians in one area) and there were hundreds (if not thousands) of murderers from serial to "accidental". They came after anyone who was not a murderer, then if you looked across the field on a big building there was a ferris wheel which had train tracks across it and all over. They were torturing people by sending them round and round, all over it including upside down a lot. Then it panned out showing the back and the only way I can describe the back of this ferris wheel was like smouldering teeth... like coals in a fire but when they are grey. It went back to me, spiderman turned up to fight the bad guys, he wanted my help and I was going to but then had knifes thrown at my head. I hid in a white van and drove away with some other people.... then I woke up.

I hope this isn't the start of more nightmares to come, but on a plus side. Tonight I am hanging out with my two besties to watch a movie!

Till next time :)

Wednesday 2 October 2013

On a mission

I have no idea what the weather is like near you but here in England it's raining (no surprises), so on the school run as you can imagine I got soaked! I have been in a worse situation, the wettest is by far walking over a bridge with my bestie Bee (Journeys are my Diary). Drenched to the bone, I don't think I have ever been so soaked and as much as I love the rain, I don't want to be that wet again!

Now I want to get to the actual post (how lucky are you guys getting so many posts off me!). I am on a mission to lose weight (just hope I can stick to it). Now, you have no idea how hard it is to restrain myself for sweet food or how hard it is to lose weight. I am currently a size 14/16 but I use to be a size 6/8. It's quite a difference right? When I was younger, I use to be VERY thin like you look like you will break thin. I weighed about 6 stone until I went to uni, at uni I went up to 7 stone, then I got pregnant for the first time and went to 14 stone... Again a huge difference, I basically doubled my weight. I never had to worry what I ate, I could pig out or just not eat. Falling pregnant for the first time, I actually felt hungry and the doctors told me that I needed to eat meat (I was a veggie for 5 years). If I didn't eat meat, I would have gotten seriously ill, so I gave up being a veggie (although you couldn't class me as one as I hate vegetables). I would eat McDonalds A LOT and gained lots of weight.

With my second pregnancy I let go when I was trying for a baby, but I didn't add on as much weight as last time and after my second baby I weigh the same as I did before I was pregnant (NOT 14 stone, less but I don't like telling people). I was so anxious about putting on weight I carefully monitored myself.

Now, it is time to go down some size, I do not want to be a size 6/8 because I looked ill. I personally would LOVE to be a size 10 but I will quite happily be a size 12 which is more realistic (I hope!). So last night I went on my first powerwalk with my other bestie Hollie aka Momo to me (A Touch of Magic) Powerwalking sounds daft but 3 months after my baby, having done no exercise it's perfect because I cannot jog for the life of me. However, I am hoping it will work up to a jog and then a run. So we have to powerwalk 3 times a week, for 20 minutes and then next week we move up 5 minutes until you are doing an hour. In between if I have time I will be doing other little exercises to keep toned. I just hope I keep up with it to lose the weight, wish me luck!

Till next time

Tuesday 1 October 2013

Being a Mother (Part 4)

Motherhood

So now you are a Mother, you think to yourself sometimes "Oh gosh, what have I done? Will I cope? He (or she) is all mine". They are normal thoughts, every Mother goes through those thoughts and it doesn't get easy (well at least not for a while!). Being a Mother is hard work, no matter what anyone says, you "work" 24/7 forever (even when they are 18 they still come home or phone for many different reasons). So what changes?

Friends -  Some friends just give up on you because you have a new child and let's face it, you can only cope with that child and nothing else for a while. However, if they are true friends they stick with you through thick and thin.

Appearance - Well, your boobs are bigger and leak on ALL your tops no matter how many breast pads you have on. Your stomach is like jelly, it doesn't look nice at all but a pair of great sucking in pants work wonders! You have stretch marks for your boobs to your thighs and in places you thought would never get them. You barely have time to brush your teeth let alone put make up on, you stop caring about how you look and its a bonus if you don't have sick on you!

Gaining a new limb - Your child is permanently attached to you, you don't want to put them down and when you do they don't want letting go.

Pass the parcel - Everyone wants a hold of the baby, they get passed from pillar to post and don't care as you watch anxiously - having a heart attack every time you think the baby will be dropped/sat on or not supported.

Lonely - You and the baby, Baby and you, Baby day, baby baby baby. For the first few weeks you get an influx of visitors but then it dwindles out. Then it becomes incredibly lonely!

Advice? Get into a routine, don't be afraid to ask for help and sometimes take other peoples advice (within reason)

Monday 30 September 2013

Being a Mother (Part 3)

Yeah, I suck! I don't post enough, I don't write like a blogger does and my writing skills are terrible! But, I enjoy posting when I get a chance and it helps me let go. I have  been uber busy with life but I wont post about this until later so let's get back to being a mother.

After Birth

So you think it's all over, you have the baby you wanted and no matter how ugly they actually are you think they are a gift from God. Now let me tell you something about after birth - it's not over.  I have never experienced anything other than natural birth so can only tell you about that and no other way.

Placenta - It comes out after your baby and tends to be the same size. The good thing is, it does not tend to hurt but it comes with the urge to push still!

Stitches - You might be lucky (I was with my first) and need none or you could be VERY unlucky. With my second child he weighed 9lb 9oz and gave me a little tear, I only needed 6 stitches but it still scared the crap out of me! They normally inject you to numb your area but geeze that hurts!

Knackered - You are so tired you feel like you could sleep forever but something is stopping you. No matter how hard you try you cannot fall asleep

Mess - You are such a mess from sweat, blood and all other sorts of crap! You have a shower/bath but you can barely move and if you have a bath it just looks like blood.

Sore - You area, hurts. Peeing hurts and you daren't poo in case your insides fall out (which they don't)

Bleeding - You have a massive period that can last 6 weeks and it's so heavy you actually need the maternity pads. They become your life saver for sitting down.

After pains - For your first child it's like a strong period pain but for any other children you have after this it's like a contraction and no pain killer touches it!

Hormones - They are still there and still raging, you will cry at nothing and feel like you wont cope but you just get one with it (I do advise if you feel down for longer than 2 weeks you go see your GP or talk to someone about it because it could be postnatal depression)

Baby - You are now responsible for another being who demands your time and you don't know how you will cope. Sometimes you don't feel that instant love you thought you would but don't worry this changes once everything is settled (if not visit GP or speak to someone)

Nipples - If you are breastfeeding, you nipples KILL and become cracked (even bleed at times). There are ways around it, like nipple cream and nipple shields but you need to be careful. Some nipple cream you need to wipe off and the nipple shields can affect your breast milk. OH and it hurts to start with.

Hair - Those luscious locks you got thanks to your baby - disappears. Your hair falls out so much you think you are going bald.

So I am no expert, this is just all experience and each pregnancy/birth is different so may not happen. My last part will be done shortly, its basically on how I feel now...

Till next time

Saturday 31 August 2013

8 years

I am putting my being a mummy post on hold (there is two more of them I need to do), the reason for this is because my partner and I have been together for 8 years today. We are a little broke at the moment with me being on maternity so for our "anniversary" (we are not married) I made him some yummy cakes and a card. I know he will appreciate it but I have a feeling he's forgotten it's today (he tends to forget), it does make me a little sad but I am glad it's not a proper anniversary.

During our 8 years together we have been through a lot - ups and downs, children, funerals, weddings and lots of birthdays! But I proud that we stand here today, 8 years on and stronger than ever! I don't know what the future holds for us but I know what I would like and I will let you all know too...

I hope that one day we can get married - I would very much like my dream wedding but he would rather get married when we can afford. However, at this rate we will never be able to afford it and I would like to get married before anymore of our family members pass away (especially my father who is 70 next year). I hope that we will possibly have another child one day (but I don't mind not having no more). I hope that we will one day have our own house (we rent off his parents). I hope we will be able to go abroad on holiday (I have never been abroad and of course we would have to take the children as it would be unfair not to). I hope to have a better job for the both of us (be that more money or a job we love.

If my hopes don't happen I can honestly say "oh well". As much as I would love for some of these to happen I know I have two beautiful lovely children, a lovely great partner and the some of the best friends ever! My life is good. So happy anniversary to my darling partner!

Friday 16 August 2013

Being a Mother (Part 2)

This is not the last post there is one more to come, I just have to find the time and let's face it motivation to do it!

Birth

Birth scares most women when they are pregnant, those who tell you they were not scared are probably lying because at some point either before or during labour they are scared. I know with my first I was terrified and then with my second I was scared but I knew I could handle it. Obviously different people have different pain thresholds, I was expecting to be a wuss with my first as I find silly things painful. However, I handled both my labours beautifully and I was lucky - not everyone is. Both my labours were straight forward, I was induced due to lack of movement from both and with my last I just had gas and air. I did ask about other pain relief in my weaker moment  but never took it. With my first I didn't know a lot because I was never told and I will probably miss out a lot on here as well.

Active labour  - This is when your contractions are two minutes apart and the midwife starts counting from because those contractions you have at home or randomly spaced out - don't count! They count to you of course because they hurt like hell but you wont be going to hospital nor getting any pain relief (unless you count paracetamol) until active labour.

Pain relief - If you don't need it, good for you! However don't be afraid to ask for some, if you are stressed so is your baby. They will offer you paracetamol first, then gas and air which can make you feel sick (with my first it did but not my second) and then they go higher unless you say I want this.

The ring of fire - When your baby's head is about to pop out - you will know! They don't lie about it feeling like you are on fire... DO NOT push until you have a contraction though otherwise you will rip!

Pushing - I was lucky, my body had the urge which I couldn't control. Others are not so lucky - Listen to your midwife if you don't have an urge and don't give up because it is easy to do so sometimes.

I will do after birth on a separate post - feel free to add as every birth is different!

Monday 12 August 2013

Being a Mother (part 1)

I know I haven't posted in a very long time so firstly I am sorry but for the past 8 weeks I have been looking after my newborn son. He is obviously adorable to me, I am not sure how others perceive him and nor do I care. This particular post is not about the upsides of having a newborn, I don't want to scare any body nor put them off having children but this is what you need to know.

Pregnancy

Do you think it will be a fun time? You are thinking it will be a wonderful joyous moment, first kick and that pregnancy glow! Well let's say it is not like that for everyone...
Morning sickness - It doesn't just last the morning and you don't always throw up (I just had nausea)
Indigestion/Heartburn - It can feel like you are having a heart attack and it can be so serve you throw up (which I did have)
Blood tests - You should only have a few but then they will find you have low iron or something else so then you need to have a billion blood tests
Jabs - Now you have a flu jab and whooping cough. The flu jab gives you a sore dead arm and the Whooping cough makes you ill so you feel like shit
Expanding body - now if you are slim its more than likely people will assume you are pregnant. However if you have an average or above it is more than likely people will assume you are getting fat until your bump improves (I had someone say to me "Oh you are pregnant? I just thought you were getting bigger" aka fat)
Break outs - spots appear at the worst time, sometimes single other times clusters (I have always had spots but being pregnant makes mine go away)
Endless appointments - you have quite a few with your first and with your second its normally less (unless you are me and have issues so get a lot of appointments that you feel like you are taking the piss with work)
Scans - These you can dread, you worry that something will be wrong but when it is all ok you sigh with relief
Hormones - people think it is an excuse or that it is something they will be fine with and ok sometimes that is the case but then you can get the other end where you cry for no reason.
People - the worst of it is other people. They think when you have this big pregnancy bump they have the right to touch, push and poke your bump. They think its ok to ask "oh is there more than one in there" when it is just one and the scans TELL you it is one (it is VERY unlikely you have a second or even third in your bump without someone noticing)

There is SO much more and some I did not experience so feel it would be unfair to say about it I cannot give a true reflection. Part 2 will be about birth and just after...

Monday 3 June 2013

News articles getting to me


I was going to blog about the cake I made my friend (it turned out really well!) but after reading the news I need to blog about something else...

The article I have read was about a 4 year old child who was starved to death by his parents, they would lock him in his room to get some peace and quiet – a room which does not sound suitable for a child of any age. The full article so you can all read: 4 year old starved by parents

I have a 5 year old son Joshua, in reception; I cannot imagine ever doing this to him. In fact I struggle to get him to eat at times, he’s a fussy eater like myself but he eats better than I do. I worry that he does not get enough food and when he tells me he is hungry I want to give in (before dinner/tea) but don’t since he needs proper meals. He does get snacks, he also weighs 3 stone (there about) which is normal for a child of his age.

The 4 year old boy weighed just half of what my son weighs; I want to cry just thinking about the poor boy who stole fruit and food from the school and the school kids. I will never understand how a parent could let that happen to their child, I hope that the parents are punished but at the same time I hate the fact that if they go to prison they will have a comfy bed, 3 meals a day and access to TV’s.
What goes through a parent's mind to say oh well it's just my kid, I can understand that some parents struggle with children but that's the point of discipline - you are the parent, you are bigger than they are and can control what they do. I don't mean beating the crap out of a child or no food what so ever. I mean a normal punishment like no TV, no sweets or sitting them in a naughty corner! Some Mums get depressed after having a baby and at times they have bad thoughts but they get help and learn to love their child! What is wrong with these people, some people cannot have children at all and they want them so badly. Can't they see they have been given a gift? It is not fair that some people who have children can treat them so badly! Seriously, its a responsibility that YOU have chosen, DEAL with it and look after your children properly!

I really need to stop reading news articles that involve children, especially those so close to the age of my son or soon to be son.

Thursday 30 May 2013

I haven't posted for a while

Why?

I simply cannot be bothered, it doesn't help that today I uber grumpy, anything is setting me off at snapping. Well snapping or the fact I could cry at something even more ridiculous, I guess it's normal for me at the moment being 38 weeks pregnant but I wish the mood would just fuck off... I need to be in the right state of mind because I have things to do.

I am going to try a proper blog post eventually, it's for the cake I am making for my best friend's murder mystery birthday party - she is an actual blogger where as I am a here there and everywhere sort of blog! You should check hers out though (if anyone read this her blog is Bee's blog ). I just have to remember to take pictures but I can't blog about it until after Friday (when the party is!), just wish me luck that it turns out how I want it! I am trying something which has been tested but I wasn't too impressed just hoping I will be impressed with the end result...


Thursday 16 May 2013

Feeling emotional


Today has not been overall easy for me, not due to any particular reason just one of those emotional up and down days! At this moment in time I am fighting tears so I don't go to school to pick my son up looking like a prat. I reckon it’s a combination of feeling ill, being in pain, work things, home things and most likely hormones.

 

I started off yesterday feeling proper rough - headache, nose running and sore throat. Basically caught Tom’s cold! I went in to find that work had decorated my desk; I got a balloon, flowers, chocolates and lots for the baby! They reckon I won’t be there till Friday the 24th when my Maternity leave starts because I look big (which I will come to later). I came home, couldn't do any house work due to lack of energy but feeling okish. Then Tom and I opened the gifts work got for the baby, there was outfits, shoes, milk, juice, a record book, a voucher for mothercare, hand/foot print, bath stuff, even a big brother top for Josh and more! I then go bed early and sleep.

 

So I went and got Josh, meaning I am not loner battling tears before going to get him – I am also not crying!

 I wake up without headache (which I am glad of since I work with computers and the lights on them irritate the fuck out of me when I have a headache. However I still have a running nose and sore throat with cough. Go to work, talk to my friend about the package I received and how much I loved it. To which she replied that everyone at works loves me, I said I was surprised to how much I got and she said she collected a total of £150! I was a little overwhelmed but I just got one with my job and went to my midwife. She tells me the baby is back to back meaning I have to try and turn him before he comes out! It’s not a bad thing but can prolong labour, just got to spend a lot of time on all fours! This comes to my bump size, I am measuring fine and she is not worried about my size at all! My bump looks different recently and bigger because of the way baby is lying, she even estimated (but couldn’t say if she was definitely right) that the baby would weigh about early 7lbs right now.

 

So I feel a bit worried about the fact the baby is lying the wrong way purely because I don’t want prolonged labour but there is things we can do to resolve it! She made me get on the weighing scales too (which I will ALWAYS hate) but was surprised when she told me that I have put on less than the recommended (also made me feel happy). But I have sugar in my urine, she’s not worried but will check in 2 weeks! I am just so uncomfy and sick of puking when the indigestion/heartburn appears. Then I worry about how I will cope, with a newborn again, money and other things too… It’s easy to say take each day as it comes but my brain doesn’t process like that. I am not asking for people to comment, in fact if you want to comment -  please don’t give me some sort of patronising comment about what I can do! I know what I can do I just want to talk because it helps me stop worrying to get it all down. As one of the saying goes “A burden shared is a burden halved” 

Sunday 12 May 2013

Not a fan of mint chocolate? Think again!

It’s come to that time again where I review one of the bzz campaigns I get! In case you don’t know what a bzz campaign is check out www.bzzagent.co.uk, they basically send you free samples and you review them – it can take a while to get one or it can be really quick. As long as you follow what they say like doing all the surveys (if you keep on top of the you only do the odd one every now and then) and review products in different ways (blogs, pictures, twitter, Facebook etc) it doesn’t take long at all.

This time I got to review mint aero bubbles, I am a chocolate lover (a huge chocolate lover) and mint chocolate is not my favourite (I am more of a plain chocolate but do like the odd flavoured one). So bzz sent me 6 packets of mint aero bubbles, a few lucky people got a packet to themselves and I had one too. I did give some to mint chocolate lovers and they seemed to like them, my partner who is not that bothered about mint chocolate stole a second packet (very cheeky of him) but that usually means he likes it!
 

For me, I would not choose mint chocolate over normal chocolate and I tend to find mint chocolate a bit too minty which over powers the smooth chocolate taste. So I tried one to start off with, I do tend to let the chocolate melt in my mouth rather than crunch it so I was surprised when I let the aero bubble melted away in my mouth. The taste surprised me as well, I was expecting to be overwhelmed by mint but it was the perfect combination for mint and chocolate for me.

The packet although normal size you would not expect to get as many bubbles in as you receive, because of the taste as well I didn’t feel like I had to put the packet down and come back to them. In standard supermarkets at the moment you can get a big pack (135g) for £1 but they are normally £1.59, which I find considerable cheap since most bags of chocolate are now reaching the £2 mark if not over! The small bags tend to be the same price as a chocolate bar, which I find sad since the price of chocolate bars these days upsets me!

Mint aero bubbles are well worth the buy, especially for mint chocolate lovers but also those who want a fresh smooth minty chocolate taste without an over powering mint taste. If you are not too sure, please just give it a try, buy a small packet and be surprised!

Sunday 5 May 2013

Halls Bzz Campaign

I have been getting quite a few campaigns recently, which has been lovely since I have been rather bored with my computer, so yeah not been blogging as much. In case you have just looked at this blog the brief overview is I review certain products for www.bzzagent.com – I love it because I get to try new products as do my family and friends (when I get samples!) I would seriously recommend joining, even if you only get the odd campaign it’s still worth it!

I got to try Halls Lemon and Hall Peppermint, they came in small packets which my partner found hard to open. However, if he read the back of the packet rather than just tearing into it he would have realised how to open it with ease. The Halls were very small, just a bit bigger than a million (if you remember those sweets) but they were quite affective. You would have to put more than one to feel the effects on your throat which is a shame since a normal size you would need just one. Maybe that is not what they are for however because of the brand I assumed it was. The Lemon is a lovely flavour and my favourite, I have never been a huge fan of Peppermint but it makes me feel like I can breathe.
 

 

With bzz pack they sent me a pen and some sticky notes which surprised me but I found useful (even if my son claimed them for himself!) Pens are something I never have enough of and use at work so in a way I suppose it’s a great way to advertise, which leads to people asking questions then me giving them the story of being a bzz agent!
 

If I am honest, I would rather buy a pack of normal size halls than these mini boxes because I just want the ease of one rather than a couple of the little ones. Plus the regular packets are 45p where as these boxes are 55p in standard supermarkets, however my partner really enjoys them so I wouldn’t feel like it was too much of a waste of money (it’s cheaper than a regular size chocolate bar these days!).
 

Wednesday 24 April 2013

E45 Bzz Campaign

In case you haven’t read any of my posts before, I am part of a website which allows me to test new products and then tell everyone my thoughts (sometimes I get free samples for friends/family etc). This great website is www.bzzagent.co.uk, seriously check it out!

My recent campaign was E45 Nourish and Restore but also the plain E45, which I have used and think it’s great because the whole family can use it! However the E45 Nourish and Restore, well that’s another story. As a pregnant person you find (for some people) that your skin changes and mine in particular gets dry, I have dry hands and then random dry patches everywhere. Whereas other moisturisers do nothing or irritate my skin further the E45 Nourish and Restore has done what the bottle says!



I was pleasantly surprised to receive my bzz kit and find two bottles (not tiny bottles) for me to test, and then as well I got free samples to give out, which had three sashes of the E45 Nourish and Restore. I gave out my samples to family, friends and co-workers – all have said good things and are quite interested in the product.
 

What always seems to disappoint me with such a good product is the price in local supermarkets, at the moment this is £4.50 for a 250ml bottle. If I had more money I would buy it however being a Mother and having another child on the way I won’t be buying this product often(maybe once in a blue moon). For my friends, family and co-workers only so many (if they have been impressed) will buy the product. But I do recommend for those who have sensitive skin or even the odd dry patch to give it a go!

Wednesday 17 April 2013

Today could have been better


Today has not been a good day for me; I won’t go into a lot of details because some of it I feel should not be put for everyone to see! But in short, I ended up in tears and pretty much having a panic attack. Which didn’t help when I had to do a group exercise, which was part of an interview for my current role in my job but it went ok (I think). This I can go into more detail, basically I cover a supervisor position and if the person I cover wanted to come back to the role I would go back to being an agent. However, for some reason I and the two other covers have to retake an interview (along with other candidates) for those cover positions. I find out tomorrow, I am not worried if I don’t have the role because I get to go on Maternity soon but at the same time it would be a shame since I have done the role for 2 years!

Another thing that has upset me today (but I am a little over sensitive), why do people think its ok to call a pregnant person fat! I have got a large bump, people have been calling me fatty etc for a long time during this pregnancy but now it’s starting to get to me. For me, I have an issue with my body and I am very sensitive when it comes to weight… I try not to be and normally smile or laugh because I don’t see the point in letting it get to me. But when I was pregnant with my first child (who is now 5) at the start I weighed about 7 stone, was real thin and honestly I probably looked ill. I doubled my weight with my first child… I did get rid of some of the extra weight but it knocked my confidence. I will say I look healthier for having a bit of weight on me rather than how thin I was. Now I am pregnant for the second time one of the concerns I have had is will I put on a lot of weight like last time, I ask my partner, friends, family and mostly they say no but I wonder if I have… Writing this is actually making me quite tearful which may sound silly to most but I honestly don’t deal well with weight and have been ignoring it for the past 5 years because that’s how I found it easier to deal with it. My baby is due in 7 weekish, I guess I will see how much bigger I am then (well probably a little longer than that) but I do plan to breast feed, exercise (when I have recovered from the labour) but only time will tell. I just want the comments to stop…

Wednesday 10 April 2013

Sorry I haven’t been around!


So I have had a busy time off work, its half term and I have been to visit my mums! The first few days I didn’t do much other than tidy my house and there is still more to do, which I am not looking forward to.

So I went my Mum’s Friday and just got back today, I am shattered! The reason we went down was so Joshua could go to Wembley to watch Crewe Alexander and Southend. He went Sunday morning at 5am… I had to wake him at 4:30 and normally he would kick off at being woken but no he was up straight away. Totally hyper, he loved it and Crewe won so he was ecstatic! He didn’t sleep on the way there nor on the way back, he even sung Jingle bells on the way back and was so chuffed.

I will update better but I really just can’t be bothered. I guess I will be in a rut for a few days again or maybe it’s the lack of sleep.

Wednesday 3 April 2013

Things that are irritating me

So I actually removed someone from facebook for the first time because they offended me, I actually don’t really need them on my facebook they are my sisters longest friend’s brother who I use to hang around with when I was ickle. I don’t tend to talk about my religion because I don’t feel the need to push it on people and I am not the perfect Christian at all. It was something small which most people would not find offensive but if I don’t force my view I don’t expect people to force theirs on me (Although a lot do). He was annoyed because of all the religious posts people put on their facebook, but there is this great thing about facebook where you can hide people’s annoying statuses or even better a remove button. No instead he has a rant on his saying how he doesn’t want to see their religious posts (still not offended at the moment), how he will remove anyone who keeps posting them (yeah not offended because I don’t) but then he goes on to say how Jesus is imaginary. That is his view yes, but not mine and it pissed me off. I asked a girl at work if I should be offended or not because I wouldn’t want to overreact and she is not religious but said if she was me she would be offended. So instead of moaning about it on my facebook and pushing my beliefs on everyone – I removed him. Honestly, I don’t actually think it’s that offensive (I have heard worse) but I don’t really want people telling me what is or isn’t imaginary. Don’t get me wrong, if you don’t believe that is your choice and I won’t really go into a conversation with people about it. I have my reasons just as everyone has theirs not to believe, or have a different culture (although I find it interesting to learn about them), or even if you are not sure.

That is just one thing, at the moment a lot of things are getting irritating and I wonder how long it will be before I snap. People keep talking down to me, like I am a child or don’t know because for whatever reason (maybe they think I am stupid). I wouldn’t say I am stupid or a child, I have my moments when I come out with ditzy things or I say something that is stupid (this does not make me stupid/thick). I can’t say I am intelligent but I am always willing to learn, if I don’t understand something I ask, I don’t tend to get jokes but I think that is just me. I don’t mind people telling me something I already know but the way people say it you would honestly think I was a child or stupid. I wonder why people do this, does it make them feel superior or do they honestly not see that I am 25 years old with a kid of my own (who I will say is well behaved most of the time) he is still alive and well looked after so surely they should see that. My sister does this a fair bit but that is the way she is, she thinks I am incapable of driving because of the one time I drove to bingo but my problem is if I don’t know where I am going I do talk nervously (this is my nature). But I am fully capable of getting to my home town which is over a 100 miles away with my son in the car, I have not had a crash (touch wood I don’t) but my confidence drops when she is in the car judging me.

I am going to stop, I am getting irritable about the irritating things…

Tuesday 26 March 2013

A New experience


I don’t tend to talk a lot about my pregnancy (Or I hope I don’t) I have no desire to flaunt it in people’s faces nor do I want always talk about it. It does pop up in conversation occasionally but I think that is mainly due to the fact that I look massive for a 29 week pregnant person. So today, I am having a little talk about something pregnancy related on my blog so people get a choice.

One of the issues that can occur in pregnancy is palpitations, now I have been pregnant before and did not experience palpitations like I have with this pregnancy. It started off as the odd one, then I use to get them quite often – around every couple of hours. I told my midwife, who told a doctor who checked me over then sent me for an EGC (on Christmas eve). The results came back normalish but they referred me to cardiology, they said the appointments can take a while and hey presto we have an appointment for today.

My appointment today, I thought I would have an ECG but no. I sat on the bed with my top half exposed and had my heart scanned. I can only compare it to having an ultrasound, I could hear my heart the way you can hear your child’s and if I looked at the screen there was a picture of my heart. It was the strangest appointment I have ever had, the noise of my heart was bizarre to me like a squelch but at the same time it is amazing what this world can do!

So that was my appointment, strange yet amazing.

Sunday 17 March 2013

My five year old's problems

Considering I couldn’t be bothered to write earlier I bet you were not expecting a post so soon! I only wanted to raise a concern of mine which has gotten me very upset tonight; it’s about my son Joshua and homework. Homework is supposed to be good for children and I think it’s a good thing, but when your 5 year old is crying because he “cant” do it – well let’s just say I don’t like homework right now.

Joshua’s homework was to go around this racetrack made out of ovals, in the ovals were words (like can, get, got etc.) and if you knew the word you could colour it in green but if you sounded it out you coloured it in orange. Joshua started off well but then all of a sudden he changed and couldn’t do it, he cried because he didn’t know the words. Now he is a soft child, I will admit that but I know the difference between crocodile tears because he can’t be bothered and real tears. These were real, I have never seen him get so upset over his homework before and I know he had the easier one as well (Thanks to one of the mums posting the homework on Facebook for another mum).
I wanted to cry myself because no child should be upset over homework, its all about learning but he honestly thought he wasn’t capable. He is capable, ok so he has some issues like he is easily distracted but that’s something I can control! What I can’t control is his lack of confidence in himself, which is weird because if you take him to playzone (big soft play area for kids) he will happily run off. He does football on a Saturday because I wanted to build his confidence and the first day he was off quite happily.
I wonder to myself if him moving house and school had an affect on him. His old school was lovely but there is some huge differences, like they didn’t do homework and they also had children who didn’t know English. So were they concentrating on the other children to get them to the same standard that those who need a little bit of help got left behind? I worry that’s a reason the fact that whilst half the class needed to learn English that those who knew English were left to their own devices, which in turn caused Joshua to be easily distracted (because whose telling them off when they concentrate on the other kids) and then he was left not doing any work.
I also feel like I need to do more, we do what the new school asks, the homework and reading. Nothing more though, so now I need to come up with something to help him improve but words are not my strong point.
I am going to stop now, purely because I feel if I don’t I will break!

Watching the Day fly by

So I am struggling to get up and do anything! I am out of bed, but I am not ready to leave my sofa. I just can’t be bothered with anything, I don’t feel motivated even though I need to do quite a bit today. I feel like I can’t be arsed to write in this blog, which is bad since I set this up to review things but its turns out to be an outlet for my frustration!

I think maybe it’s a combination of things, on Friday I worked from 7:30 in the morning through to 9pm and whereas it might not be difficult for me normally since I am pregnant I just can’t cope with it. It screwed me up the next day, I had a headache and didn’t feel like doing anything! Today I feel the same, I just cannot be bothered and it’s not a great.
I have also been reading random blogs, I look at them and think why do people want to read about that? It’s the same with facebook statuses I wonder why people do certain things and in my mind it makes no sense. I guess you can’t always understand people, even if you know them sometimes they are difficult to understand. We are all different which I get but surely common sense has to come in at some point?
I am sorry this is a crappy post, to be honest I can’t be bothered to write another more.

Thursday 14 March 2013

Struggling through

Life has a way of getting people down, it doesn’t matter who you are but you are entitled to your own problems. They might not be as big, scary or even sad as others but they are your problems. Today someone at work mentioned the fact that their life is not bad at all considering what others go through and I would have to agree with them about my own life too. Someone they know went away on a holiday and came back with a pain in their side; they thought they had pulled muscles. Turns out its cancer of the lymph’s and its spread to her brain, what makes it worse – she has two young children. It made me think, I have a young child and another one on the way. I would be terrified to think my kids would grow up without me and I am glad for the fact they don’t.
So think about your life – is it really that bad? You have bad days yes, everyone does. Problems, yes – they can be solved 90% of the time and the other 10% what is the point in worrying?
Now I cannot deal with problems without worrying, I am a born worrier and I have no idea how to change that. My life is quite stressful at the moment, I don’t want to socialise or be all smiley. I just want to do overtime at work to stop one stress but the others I cannot control which makes me mad. I have pregnancy issues; I resolve one issue and get another which is frustrating! My new one is hip problems where I need to speak to a physio to check them out, then finally got my cardiology appointment for my heart and frankly that scares me. This is all stuff that is around me, I can control it to a certain degree but how do I solve a problem which is over a 100 miles away? I can’t. Don’t get me wrong, I have to know how my brother is coping but I just get mad about it when I shouldn’t. He is currently staying with my parents for a “few” days because his wife is SO stressed with it she is making herself ill. The thing that frustrates me, he wants to be admitted but there are no spaces for him… He was caught shop lifting and is now back to drinking… he is a person who needs help and no one can give it him.
So how do I stop worrying? My life isn’t bad, in fact it’s a lovely life but it has its own issues just like everyone else’s. I just can’t seem to pull myself out of this rut; it’s hard to motivate myself. If there is anyone reading this blog and wants to give advice, by all means please do.
Out until I post again

Saturday 9 March 2013

Simple Facial Wipes Review


I have to apologise again, it has been 6 days since my last post but my life outside of the internet has been rather stressful. This post however is not about my life but about Simple Facial Wipes! I have recently become a Bzz Agent (https://www.bzzagent.co.uk/) it’s a site where you fill out surveys and they then send you products to review.
 
 

Simple Facial Wipes I can say are not something I would choose to buy normally, I never remember to use wipes (it has taken me like 2 weeks to use them and there is only 7!). I do wear makeup but I tend to just wash my face at night because wipes in general tend to make my mascara go ALL over my face.

The Simple Facial Wipes are different from wipes I have used before, they are not too wet or dry and they are quite big! They feel quite soft too, so they don’t have that rough edge to them or you feel the need to scrub your face rather than wipe. My skin is not normally sensitive however when I am pregnant it’s actually VERY sensitive, it becomes dry and I tend to get a lot of rashes. The Simple Facial wipes have not dried my skin out more, nor have they caused me to flare up with spots or any sort of rash (which is a big bonus for me!).  One thing I did love, my mascara is not all over my face! I spend a good half an hour sometimes trying to get my mascara off with wipes but it takes me about five minutes with these wipes. The only downside I can see is the price, its £3 for a pack of 25 and whereas the wipes are good I cannot say I would fork out £3 for wipes! I think it’s the fact I am a mum and I rather spend that £3 on something else like milk or bread – it’s not cheap being a parent so I am sure unless you earn a decent wage (which I don’t but it is better than a lot of others) that you can see the disadvantage to good wipes! I would say it’s about an 8/10 – points deducted for price and how many you get in a pack!

This is the first time I have reviewed a product so any help would be appreciated if you think I need to include more or less! Let me know!

Out for now

Sunday 3 March 2013

A quick post

I apologise for not posting, I have been so busy and honestly - I feel quite stressed and down. I know what is causing it (I think) but I cant see an outcome right now... I will get round to posting something, probably about my facial wipes from bzz agent or something else...

Out for now but not forever

Sunday 24 February 2013

Week away at my Mums Part 2

Wednesday

So Wednesday we went swimming at the Nantwich swimming pool (http://www.cheshireeast.gov.uk/leisure,_culture_and_tourism/leisure_facilities/my_nearest_centre/nantwich_swimming_pool.aspx), it’s one of the only brine pools in the country (Although we did not go in the outside brine pool!) and it is pretty decent however expensive for swimming! It cost me £4 and Joshua £3.20… he enjoyed it however, then after lunch we went to funky monkey (http://www.funkymonkeycafe.co.uk/) the website is pretty rubbish but the place is ok. They have a little play area (soft area) and toys, but they go everywhere. I suppose it’s because some parents do not teach their kids manners, so they are unable to tidy after themselves or treat toys with respect. It is free though, unless you buy a cup of tea which cost’s £1.70. Then that night Joshua went to the football – Crewe Alexandra (http://www.crewealex.net/) they are my home team and I use to get dragged to their matches when I was younger. Joshua however loves going, he wants to be a footballer and is already has an idol – Steve Phillips (Although Joshua calls him Steven). Check out the photo below just to see how happy Josh is to have his picture with him!
 
Thursday
My dad finally starts speaking to me again, not properly until the evening but he got over me snapping at him. In the day Joshua spent time with his cousin Georgia and we all went to snugburys (http://www.snugburys.co.uk/). I adore the ice cream here and they do many flavours but my favourite is Dutch chocolate – I always get it. I so recommend if you are near Snugburys you go no matter what the weather because the ice cream is to die for and it’s the best I have ever tried! I am not an ice cream fan but you put Snugbury’s in front of me and I will eat it. Then Thursday night I went with my sisters to Mecca bingo in Crewe (http://www.meccabingo.com/) I had a blast and even won some money as did my sisters – we split the money between us as well so we all came out with more money than what we went in with! I recommend bingo to anyone, its fun and when you are waiting for that one number you are bobbing in your seat!
Friday
I popped to Home Bargains (http://www.homebargains.co.uk/) to get some bargains, I love this shop and wish there was one here but there sadly isn’t! It’s cheap and has allsorts; I guess it’s like the modern Woolworths. Then after lunch we headed back home and got stuck in lots of traffic, so not fun! But I can say my week was eventful, not always good but eventful.
Out for now

Saturday 23 February 2013

A week away at my Mums Part 1

Saturday
I drove down to my mum’s in Nantwich, which is a small town in Cheshire – it’s quite lovely but a bit boring at times. Tom (my partner) always says it’s where the old people live and I guess it’s true in away but who can blame them. It takes me about 2 hours and a half to get there which is ok but I struggle due to an ankle injury which causes it to stiffen up and hurt. I didn’t do anything this day, although this was the day I found out my brother didn’t want to live anymore and attempted to take his own life…
Sunday
I went to a pub call the Peacock (http://www.pub-explorer.com/cheshire/pub/peacockhotelnantwich.htm) with my sister’s Carrie, Amber, Matt (Amber’s partner), Jodie (Matt’s daughter) and Josh (my son).We spent most of the time outside so the kids can run round in the play area which is more designed for 2-3 year old and seems completely pointless! Amber, Matt and Carrie all ordered their dinner (I had mine) they had a sharer which went down well and no issues there. Then we went inside where the kids got ice cream and we all got dessert, I had a chocolate fudge cake which was lovely! Some of the staff were lovely however there was a rude gentleman behind the bar which irritated me when I was ordering.
Monday
I went up town with my Mum, Dad and Josh however got into an argument with my father over Josh to which my dad stormed off because I would not allow him to speak to Joshua the way he did. So my Mum, Josh and me went to the sweetshop (http://nantwich.cheshiremarkettowns.co.uk/food-and-drink/mr-simms-olde-sweet-shop-p110571) best sweet shop in the world! Good value for money and a pick a mix what more could you want! Then we went to get Joshua so astro turf trainers and shoes from wynsor shoe store in Crewe (http://www.wynsors.com/) it’s cheap and they have lots of choices.
Tuesday

Joshua and myself went up town to meet Nic Nic (Joshua’s Godmother and my lifelong friend) we went Chatwins for lunch (http://www.chatwins.co.uk/) which wasn’t too expensive but can be if you are eating in. I had a meat and potato pie which had a bit too much pepper in for me but I do not like seasoning, Joshua had a sausage roll which he didn’t eat but this normal for him so nothing to do with the sausage roll. After Nicola went, mum, Josh and me went to the candle factory (http://www.cheshireworkshops.co.uk/candle_workshops.php) which is great, you can paint models, make a badge, make a candle, paint a candle holder and more! It’s fun for the kids but the costs can add up if you don’t get an offer. We paid £11 for 4 items which is a good offer! Joshua enjoyed it and I recommend it for children. There are items for sale too, quite a few actually like the candles made my professionals which are quite fancy!
That’s it for today, I will update again tomorrow.
Out for now.

Tuesday 19 February 2013

Who are you thankful for?

I have been reading quite a bit, whether it’s a news article, blog or even a book. I have realised a few things on my way, to a point where I find certain reads frustrating and pointless, yet I still read. What I want to discuss is the fact no one hardly ever says thank you anymore, or give credit to the people that have helped them. I am not saying I am perfect I reckon I have forgotten a thank you in my time or said wow gee that’s really nice of you, you didn’t have too.

Tom – my partnerAs much as we get on each other nerves, been through rough and calm – we are still here. I struggle sometimes to express my feelings, that are normal but he should know that I do love him. He is always there for me (although he doesn’t bring me a cuppa when I am poorly), but he does clean the house, do the dishes (even if it includes a dishwasher) and he is SO good with Joshua (our son). He wants to work as well, he does but he does not get the thanks there he deserves. Some people might disagree with that but he works damn hard and he loves his job.
My Mum My mum is not my best friend, I don’t have that sort of relationship with my mum, she is my mum. She gives great advice, always willing to help where she can and spoils Joshua (and my soon to be baby). My mother does not have a bad bone in her body, she puts up with us all through all our faults and no one thanks her for what she does. I love my Mum, I wouldn’t change her for the world nor would I change my upbringing.
My best friends I am lucky to have at least two best friends in my life right now, one I have known for ten years if not more and one I have known for a while but we have been very close now for a few years. Hollie is the one I have known for years, she always listens to my craziness and is sometimes crazy with me! Bee is the one who I have come close too, I rant to her too and she gives great advice, we have funny chats and she is always so thoughtful. I couldn’t ask for better best friends, they each get me and I love going to see them. They do little things for me, which is always unexpected (Like getting tulips on Valentine ’s Day as me and my partner don’t celebrate this – we don’t care for it). The never get enough thanks for what they do and they have both done a lot in their part, present and most likely future.
Lastly but never least
Joshua and my soon to be babyI will never be more thankful than I am to have Joshua or the baby I about to have, Joshua although has his moments, is a well behaved child and so polite. I hope his baby brother will follow in his footsteps (but avoiding our Joshua food issues) and I am sure that Joshua will be a great big brother!
Thanks to all those I know and love.

Sunday 17 February 2013

Pet peeve's of the day


I thought I would be one of those people who would not use this blog to rant but more to say my opinion on trivial things, but today I feel a lot has gotten to me and I need an outlet. I can't post everywhere and plus the people that I know won’t know about this blog.

#1. People thinking Mothers who don't are "cop" outs!

Firstly I am a WORKING mother; I have a full time job and have one child then another on the way. But seriously, do these people have ANY idea, kids ARE a full time "job" (I say "job" because they are our love and joy so we class it as life and would do it regardless) We are with them 24/7 pretty much, we wake up at 3 o’clock with them, clean them up if they are poorly and pretty much run ourselves mad doing stuff for them! I know single mums and mums with partners (father of the child and not). To put a child in Nursery full time (normally 8 - 6 since most people work 9 - 5ish) it costs £600 - £700 and if the government help (if you don't earn too much) it cost about £500. Imagine that, and then rent, bills, food, petrol, clothes, shoes etc. - can you honestly say some of these mums are better off working?!?! I would rather not work on occasions because I miss my child - some people don't understand that some people CANNOT work because it's just not affordable especially if you are on minimum wage!

 #2 People who say they are broke yet spend shit loads on crap

"Oh, I am so broke... but look at this cute dress I brought from Debenhams - it was a bargain only £35" £35 is A LOT! For Christ sake I can live off £17 for food, if you are broke don't spend your money on shit for you! That includes a "bargain" - it is NOT a bargain if you don't need it. If you say my kid has grown out of the shoes and I have no more pairs - YES it's needed but if your kid has a couple pairs of shoes that fit and aint wrecked, you do not need it! That includes stuff for you, there is WANT and NEED. Wanting is something you don’t need and needing is what you cannot do without like toilet roll!

#3 finding out something when really you should have known 18 months ago

Found out my brother has been on anti-depressants for 18 months then the other day decided to put a bag over his head in an attempt to kill himself, I can’t stand people who commit suicide because to me it’s selfish but I do understand it’s a mental problem – I just struggle to apprehend something like that because of the impact it has on the kids and family. Like the impact it’s having on my sister-in-law and their 3 kids who are old enough to understand what suicide is. I am not the one who needs to know that but it would be nice for my dad to have been in the loop so I didn’t have to see him cry! (He has only ever cried two times now, once at my Aunty Jean’s funeral and the other day finding out his only son is suicidal)

 #4 Sandwiches (or anything along that) that have mayo in and not say on the package

I HATE mayonnaise (not as much as one of my friends because I can scrape it and she can’t) so why the hell if it says “Just chicken” do they then put mayo on it. It should be chicken sandwich with mayo – some people DO NOT like mayo! Give them side pots or sashes of mayo so they can add it, I rather that than taking a bite out of a yucky mayo infested sandwich!

I do have a LOT more pet peeves but they are just the ones I want to moan about today!

Out till next time